4. Even if they don't want to lash out, sometimes people with autism can’t control their aggression
An autistic person who is acting aggressive might not be able to control what he or she is doing, despite understanding your commands to stop. A crisis situation can overwhelm their bodies to a point beyond their own control.
If an autistic person is actively hurting themselves, it means that they are distressed. Instead of acting aggressively towards other people, they can redirect their behavior towards themselves. The best thing you can do is try to relieve their distress.