Healthy Living

State of the Union: Are Couples Having Less Sex?

When it comes to sex, quality is more important than frequency

So, is less frequent sex really a problem?

Herbenick goes on to explain how having less sex does not necessarily mean being less sexually fulfilled. She says, "we may be having less sex, but I would argue it's better sex. We actually don't know if singles are having 'less sex' since the (survey) never defined sex and doesn't ask about the many kinds of sex play that people engage in (including masturbation, oral sex and sex toy play), especially during hookups. It is possible that singles are having less frequent intercourse but about the same (or more or less) of other kinds of sex, such as oral sex or hand stimulation or sex toy play."

Pasciucco agreed and noted that the quality of sex was more important than the frequency. She shared, "as a certified sex therapist, I am more concerned with the type of sex - is it intense on an emotional, intellectual, physical and spiritual level? - than I am on the number of times per week."

Some even note that the drop of number of times per week could be a positive thing, as it could result from a cultural shift and further female empowerment, allowing women to say no. It could be a sign that the age of women having to succumb to their husbands’ desires is ending, and instead being replaced with more meaningful, albeit less frequent, sex.