Watching the Loss of My Mom to Alzheimer's Disease

How did you first feel when your mother told you that she had Alzheimer's/Dementia?

Very sad for her. She was a nurse and had cared for so many elderly patients herself for years. Also nursing my dad through cancer when he was 40 and she had 3 children under 12. She took an early retirement, hoping to enjoy life to the full, but was diagnosed 9 years later aged 69. She knew exactly what was happening so she was initially angry and in denial. We were all devastated for her as it all deteriorated so quickly. We lost her two years ago sadly. 

This disease takes away a lot. What do you miss the most about your mom?

Just calling her up and chatting on the phone, we used to have long weekly chats about life, family and work. Singing together, playing piano duets. Laughing and having fun. Going on holiday together. 

What sacrifices have you made to make sure that your mom has the best possible care?

Dad cared for her at home as long as he could, then he became ill too, so we found the best care home possible. Visited as often as possible, but she deteriorated quickly and sadly passed away. 

Do you have any pieces of advice for new caregivers with a mom who has Alzheimer's?

Don’t contradict, agree, pacify. Accept their confusion, don’t get frustrated by the repetitions and forgetfulness etc, it is part of who they are now. Try to reminisce, trigger old memories, sing, dance, be childish. Hug them lots and indulge them.