How has fibromyalgia affected you as a mom?
I was not diagnosed with fibromyalgia until my girls were in high school and older. But before that, I had a cerebral hemorrhage in 1993 that left me visually impaired and affected my fine motor skills and mobility. This affected my children more than the fibromyalgia did.
I have to include being a grandmother in this topic. Not being the grandmother I want to be is one of my greatest sorrows. Since all of my grandchildren live some distance away, I do not get to see them as often as I would like. I have trouble traveling and accommodations near or with them are not comfortable.
Even communicating is difficult. Because of fibromyalgia I don't really like to call them often, and they do not reach out to me on their own. (The oldest is just 15 and she is kept busy watching her siblings.) I do connect with them through Facebook and see pictures that their families post.
How do your children inspire you to keep on going?
Because I know that we have time to get together and set it up to fit in their schedules, I plan ahead so I can attend. This may mean resting or napping before hand, packing medicines and snacks I may need, and the clothes I will wear. I even have a bag that I carry exercise and massage tools in and take pillows.
What advice do you have for other moms with fibromyalgia?
Teach your children to do all the housework, as age appropriate, that they can do for themselves. Then when you cannot do it for them they will have the ability to take care of themselves and help you. A benefit of this will be their independence and assurance that they can handle living alone when they leave home.
What do you wish your children would understand?
They do not see me every day. I wish they really understood why I don't reach out to them very often and how disabled I really am. Also, how I can be feeling well one second then with a turn of my head, or nothing at all, feel lousy.