8 Steps To Allow Change to Build Strength of Character

It is over 3 years now since our lives were turned somewhat upside down by COVID. Like many world catastrophes, if that is an appropriate term, such as this, comes enormous changes. Not just in our own backyard, but nationwide and worldwide. It has been questioned as to whether the COVID phenomenon is a conspiracy, a virus that has been deliberately exposed in order to bring about worldwide changes. Whether any of these are true or not, the many strains of COVID are true.

I believe that with any changes that happen in our lives, and given the opportunity to live a long life, it is the catastrophic events that will either bring out the best in a human being or the worst. However, in any event, it is up to the individual as to how to allow these events to affect us. There are two choices either to allow them to bring out our worst side or to allow it to bring out our best side, to build our strength of character.

I know for me personally, I had a catastrophic event, many years ago now, where an attempt was made on my life to “kill” me. I had two choices either to remain a helpless victim, bitter and twisted or to rise above to learn some amazing and important lessons that not only helped me to become well. It also enabled me to help many other people and to build inner strength in my character. It proved to be a great foundation for rising above any other catastrophes that are likely to occur.

8 Steps To Build Strength of Character

1. Know your strengths — Set up a journal if that is helpful to write down these, scoring your answers from 1–10 with 10 being your most powerful score.

• Honesty
• Perseverance
• Courage
• Fairness
• Judgment
• Social Awareness
• Forgiveness
• Compassion
• Self-Control
• Patience
• Humility
• Gratitude
• Hope
• Faith
• Optimism
• Love

2. Know your weaknesses — Taking a close look at how your scored your strengths, getting a clear picture of your lowest and highest areas. The importance of this is that often when we are faced with a catastrophic event, we tend to only remember our weaknesses, not our strengths. By understanding these it is possible then to override the weakness by implementing a strength. For example: I am a very emotional person and cry easily. This used to be on my weakness list, however, I have learned that this can be a strength when I combine it with two of my strengths, those being optimism and courage.

“Every weakness is an opportunity for us to combine this with one of our strengths in your life.” The power of prayer for me has been so helpful, in when I feel at my weakest, I pray to God to show me my strengths. I have done this from a very young child before anyone even told me about God or a Higher Power. Interesting!

3. Begone with excuses — Looking at your lists again, it is natural instinct to allow your weaknesses to become excuses, blaming others or situations for not being able to allow change to build your character. Nothing in your life will improve if you do not bring the power back to you, by turning excuses of “Why Not” into reasons as to “Why”. Saying to yourself that “I can do this” and “There is always a way”. Read or watch movies about people who survived catastrophic and traumatic events.

4. Seek help — To seek help, is an important way for you to build character, it is being brave enough to expose yourself and your difficult circumstance. It is important when seeking this help to keep it to trusted family and friends who will have empathy, not sympathy. Who will suggest ways you can maximize your strengths and improve your weaknesses. It is important to listen, not become defensive, as this is quite challenging to you both mentally and emotionally. Remember your goal is to rise above these circumstances with a positive mind and a positive attitude. Not to allow self-destruction.

5. Begin with the end in mind — This is where having a clear picture of how you want to be and how you want your life to be is important. Being clear about your goals and future plans to work step by step towards these. If you are struggling with being honest with yourself and the honesty coming from your trusted advisors, then set a goal of being honest with yourself. Being “Truthful” is the way to move forward.

6. Set healthy boundaries — This is one that will come up time and time again in your training with me. It is something that can be difficult and you will continue to implement it throughout your life. To keep it simple — Don’t engage with attitudes, and behaviors in any area of your life that cause harm to you, to others, or if the people are engaging in self-harmful habits in their life. Setting boundaries may mean limiting the time that you spend with family if they are negative or toxic people. It may mean distancing yourself from people, activities, and events that cause harm.

It is important for your mental and emotional health to engage with people who have a positive attitude, are that problem solvers, not problem makers, who are kind, warm, caring, and honest. Where the strength of character lies in that they “Take no Sh_t” from anyone. This is a major step in building your character.

“What you read, watch on television or engage with on a daily basis, will either have a positive or negative impact on your mental and emotional state. The choice is always yours.”

7. Life is not a competition nor to be compared — Wow! How often do we do this without realizing it? You are unique as are your situations and lessons for you to learn throughout life. Life is not a competition as to who is doing better than you, this is so non-character building and will debilitate you from achieving your desires and dreams. As will comparing yourself to other people. I know this is a challenge and one that most people work to overcome. The importance of this is that each of us has a different set of skills and purpose to share with the world. It is learning to work together with others that produces miracles.

“Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world has the skills and talents that you have”

8. Consistent: persistent: action & forgiveness — Living your best life begins with the understanding that it is not about achieving perfection, perfection is an unachievable “myth” both with yourself and your life. It is about accepting that you are on a continual journey of learning and being consistent, and persistent with your desires, goals and plans. Each and every day you have the opportunity to become better with positive action steps working toward building your best life. The importance of forgiveness is never to be underestimated giving yourself and others every opportunity to change for the better and never to give up.

“A person who is building strength of character do the right thing even if no one else does, not because they think it will change the world but because they refuse to have their inner core beliefs and desires changed by the world”

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