The word ‘sapio’ is derived from a Latin word which means intelligence and good sense. Thus, sapiosexual is defined as a person who is sexually attracted to another person by their intelligence above all other factors. A sapiosexual falls in love with a person of equal or greater intelligence and IQ. A sapiosexual can be defined as a person who thrives purely on intellectual exchange, and it is this intellectual exchange that finally leads to sexuality. A sapiosexual is also called a sapiophile.
Intelligence becomes the main factor in selecting a mate, and it becomes much more important than other factors like the looks, nature, personality of the mate, etc. Intelligence is their main if not sole selection criteria, which is different from people with other sexual orientations. Of course, most people do give intelligence importance while selecting a partner, but it may not always be the only or main criteria. It will often be in the list of things that they look for in their partner. But for a sapiosexual, they give intelligence prime importance and it may be the only factor that attracts them to their mate. A sapiosexual is normally a person of higher intelligence compared to others; therefore they are keener to be with someone of equal or more intelligence. Intelligence turns on a sapiosexual more than the looks, the style, the personality of the mate, etc.
Therefore, in most of the cases, a sapiosexual couple will be two individuals with exceptional intelligence. This is mainly because intelligence is the attribute that has bought the two together, unlike a typical couple who has a number of factors to look at when choosing each other. Every individual will rate each factor differently, like for instance, some may give looks more importance than the nature of the person, whereas another person may give the personality more importance. But for a sapiophile, it is only intelligence that can attract them to another person.
How can sapiosexuals benefit society?
It can be argued that sapiosexuals can benefit society. For example, if sapiosexuals get married and have children, they are most likely to be very intelligent people like their parents. This is mainly because their parents are most probably going to be more intelligent than a person with average intelligence. And if both the parents are very intelligent, then there are more chances that their children will also have the same or higher level of intelligence.
Therefore, the more sapiosexual couples, the more the number of highly intelligent people in the future. Intelligent people are a requirement in every country, as this will help in the prosperity and progress of the country. They can become leaders, entrepreneurs, and take up many other roles for the improvement of society. Most of them will become wealth creators in the future, and this can benefit the economy or prosperity of a society.
Over the years, it is intelligent people who have given maximum contribution to various fields like technology, art, science, etc. They take up many different professions like researchers, lawyers, engineers, professors, doctors, etc. Some become businessmen and set up companies with unique concepts/ideas and employ many people. Some also become politicians and leaders in many countries, and have played a major role in the development of the country.
Given below are some of the factors why people prefer intelligent people:
Intelligent men have healthy sperm
As concluded in a research study conducted by the University of Mexico, it was found that there is a strong connection between intelligence and the health of sperm in men. In the study, the sperm of 400 men were tested after they went through extreme mental testing.
The test results proved that people with high IQ levels had healthy and strong sperm. Thus, smart and intelligent men have healthy sperm.
One of the major reasons why it is advantageous for women to choose intelligent men is that they will have more chances of conceiving babies, and, they will likely be intelligent babies.
Greater the IQ, greater the sex drive
As per the findings of an adult sex toy retailer, Lovehoney, it was found that there is a very strong relation between intelligence and sex drive. They found through their sales data that there was more interest in sex from students from elite universities. So based on this study, one can easily say that intelligent people have a higher sex drive. But, it does not necessarily indicate that they have more sex compared to other people. Thus, it is better to fall in love with intelligent people if you want a healthy sex life.
Intelligence is more satisfying
For most of us, the looks of the partner is important, but gradually one realizes that looks are only a temporary feature and appearance is not the most satisfying factor one needs in a partner. The looks of a person can attract another, but not necessarily make that person fall in love. Looks are temporary, but intelligence is long-lasting.
Sapiosexual people, or sapiophiles, are very well-aware that having an intelligent conversation is more satisfying and more engaging than just being with an attractive, non-intellectual person. Sapiosexual people know that it is intelligence that will last forever in their partners, and this will keep their relationship strong. So, they will not fall for anyone based on factors that may seem attractive initially but will not help in taking a relationship further. Therefore, many times it is observed that intelligent people remain as loners. They don’t rush into relationships but are very choosy about whom they want to make their mate.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of being sapiosexual?
Just like being a homosexual or heterosexual, being a sapiosexual is not a choice that one makes; it is how the person is from birth. Similarly, being a sapiosexual is not an alternative that one intentionally picks, it is in his or her DNA and is a natural attraction that one has towards intelligent people. It cannot be controlled or changed by choice. And since communication is so very important in any relationship, experts believe that sapiosexual couples will tend to have a strong bond and long-lasting relationship compared to others. Since their level of attraction with each other is much beyond physical attributes. They can relate to each other and their level of intelligence is similar so they can have sensible conversations with each other. Since intelligence will last forever, and this is the main factor that attracts a sapiosexual, there are more chances that sapiosexual couples will be with each other for longer.
A sapiosexual couple is more likely to end up in a marriage or a lifelong relationship since it is the union of similar minds and not just physical attraction. Nowadays, there are so many relationships that don’t last long, since people look for things in their partners that need not necessarily last long like physical features, wealth, etc. An intelligent mind will last as long as a person lives, and if a person is attracted to this quality, then it is possible for such a couple to grow stronger in their union. They can have engaging conversations with each other and not get bored of each other’s company.
It is still very important for a sapiosexual person to be selective when choosing a mate. Sapiosexuals should not just be with anyone who is intelligent, they should choose someone who they can connect with and converse with.
There will be problems in a relationship when there is imbalance or rating of individuals, as this leads to comparison. When two people consider each other on the same level, the relationship will last longer. But when one considers themselves inferior or superior in regards to certain factors, there are chances of experiencing arguments and ego issues. There is no harm in admiring and appreciating the partner’s intelligence, but one must not think that they are any less and must consider oneself equal. Both partners should have the belief that they both possess qualities that are contributing in a great way in taking the relationship forward, and it is not purely due to the qualities and strengths of just one person in the relationship.
What are the signs of a sapiosexual?
Some people may know from the beginning that they are sapiosexual, and may be sure of what they are looking for in a partner or what attracts them to a partner. On the other hand, some people may not be aware that they are sapiosexual, even though they may consistently find intelligent people attractive.
Some signs that indicate a person may be sapiosexual include:
- Individuals who prefer book stores over bars: One of the things that can help a person know if they are sapiosexual is by trying to analyze how and where they spend their time. If a person prefers spending a day in the museum or library rather than being in the bar, then there is a strong possibility that person is sapiosexual. Sapiosexual people are into substance and they will prefer activities like reading books, browsing informative sites, etc.
- Individuals who like having witty conversations rather than boring conversations: Conversation is one of the factors that keep both the partners engaged, especially on first dates when both individuals are trying to get to know each other and engage in some interesting discussion. If a person is more into witty and smart conversations rather than boring chat sessions which feel more like an interview, then there are chances of the person being a sapiosexual. People who are sapiosexual will be sarcastic, pass witty comments, and speak on varied topics with a strong point of view of their own.
- Individuals who prefer silence over small talk: It is not always important to keep talking, and at times silence is required. At moments, silence can be the best way to spend time with each other. Just by saying nothing, you can give your partner his or her own time to relax and enjoy the moment. There is no need to fill every gap of silence with some unwanted conversation or discussion. A sapiosexual couple may be one who just sits with each other, munch a snack and read books side by side without speaking to each other all the time.
- Individuals who prefer substance over other factors: Sapiosexuals don’t like to just be in places or do things just because others are doing it. A sapiosexual may not like spending time in a pub. A sapiosexual will also look for people who are like them, who give more importance to substance. They will want to spend time with people who like doing similar things as them or going to similar places. They are interested in getting to know potential partners given their professions, hobbies, interests, etc. They will also rank a person based on the location he or she chooses for a date.
- Individuals who prefer people with similar taste: Sapiosexuals, as mentioned earlier, don’t follow or like things which are necessarily popular. They have their own taste and like doing things that interest them. For example, a sapiosexual may not like going to a rock show in a stadium with many bands performing and a very big audience, he or she may rather enjoy some live music for a smaller audience. It is very important for a sapiosexual to look for someone with similar taste - be it in music, food, places to visit, and more. A sapiosexual may not enjoy being with an intelligent person who has a different taste compared to his or her own.
- Individuals who give lot of importance to grammar: In the current scenario, where most of us use short texts, abbreviations, and emoticons to communicate, a sapiosexual will not be very comfortable with incorrect grammar and will give language a lot of importance. Sapiosexuals will not enjoy conversations that people have in chat sessions with use of abbreviations. They will connect with people who like conversing with proper grammar and use of language like they do.