Dr. S. Faye Snyder

You didn't say what the hallucination was. I think it is related to an unprocessed memory. Can you find truth in the nightmarish hallucination? What have you refused to remember, face, reveal? Buried trauma is relentless, when given the opportunity to express itself. Once we process it (allow memory and feelings), we are relieved.

I don't think so. You can get temporary relief. You need to get in touch with the cause of your depression. The most invisible causes are early childhood abandonment depression or neglect, often not remembered or acknowledged. If you know the reason, you have a head start. You need to talk about the feelings and the messages your mind believes that come with them. These are lies we have learned to believe, that we have to dismantle, as well as to process the feelings from whence they came.

Therapists don't read minds. This may be an issue from infancy when your primary caregiver failed to read your mind. Not sure. But, you get the most from therapy by going in and telling the therapist what is going on with you, and then you can get feedback and guidance. (Of course, this depends on the therapist. Some don't think symptoms are caused, but rather think they are inborn. That's a shame.)

Psychotropic medications always have side effects. Therapy is a better idea. But, if this is your avenue of treatment, then you need to get your meds adjusted.

Early attachment trauma makes later-in-life-trauma worse. In other words, if a child had insufficient attachment or broken attachments in the first three or four years of life, then that grown child, next to a securely attached grown child, would have a harder time in the trenches in war or in rape. So, first question: Was she securely attached in early childhood. Second question: did she see a trauma therapist? You can't heal trauma just by talking about it. And, trauma victims don't like talking about it.

He's 78 years old. Everything starts to go, sometimes in the wrong order that we would have it happen. Talk to him. Ask him what it's like to see dead relatives. Would he like to talk to them? Does he have unfinished business he'd like to express? The older we get, the weaker our mental facilities, the better our memories of the good old days. Maybe he'd like to talk about those times. Maybe about 15 minutes a day would be lovely.

Find a therapist in your area that specializes in anorexia.

Both.

Negative thoughts are learned. They are usually lies we learned. They usually include a rule not to discuss them. If you can face them, understand their origins, find the lies in them and discredit them by realizing they are wrong, you can heal yourself. If you believe they are true and ruminate over them, you are what I call, "loitering", and making yourself worse. You have to find the cruel message you have learned to believe and discredit it.

The most wonderful thing about being a woman is our period. The most unrecognized gift of womanhood is discredited. When we have our period, our unfinished business from earlier years is brought up to us, so we can face what we have avoided. Face the messages and feelings and find the source, as well as the lies. Discredit these thoughts (that cause the feelings), cry if there is unprocessed emotions for a former injury, and you should be good to go.

This behavior is not inborn. It was learned. As his parent, you probably have a better idea than anyone, except him, as to why he fears exams. Address the issue. See the cause. Discuss it. If you had any part of the cause, apologize and reassure. If you didn't have any part of the cause, apologize for not seeing him clearly enough, talking and understanding clearly enough, and tell him now that you hear, see and understand, you are sure that he need not fear his exams. All he has to do is continue to do his best, and that will always be enough for you and for him. There is no one who can reassure him and help to heal his injury like you.

Dr. Faye

There is no such thing as a bad dream. All dreams are magnificent messages from our subconscious mind to our conscious mind to push us to stop repressing information from our awake-state lives. If something bad or threatening is happening to us and we don't address it, we will continue to have warning dreams. It helps to review the dream for clues. Is the person running, floating, falling, fighting, searching, lost, afraid of abandonment or loss, etc. Such are issues to be addressed that are presently being denied.

Sit with him and discuss his dreams in depth. Let him tell you everything about it. Ask him if it reminds him of anything from his recent life. If he says, "No," ask, "Are you sure?" Then, you can leave it at that. The relevance may surface for him later. If not, rewind and try again. You are his healer. You are his confidante, hopefully. Give him understanding, which may be all he needs. If he is able to tell you something that is disturbing to him, take it seriously. Give empathy. Try not to give criticism, correction, or opinions. Don't rush in to fix anything that he can fix. Listen and try to understand.

Dr. Faye

I believe bipolar is only treatable if the patient is committed to the treatment. That's true for everyone, but especially bipolar personalities, because they have had some religious experiences due to their trauma, which helped them to overcome feelings of inadequacy. However, these experiences make them feel so special, that they are a set up for failure.

If they wanted to overcome bipolar, they would have to review and face their trauma, the misinformation that the trauma entailed, and learn new coping mechanisms that mama and dad never taught them.

I find that bipolar personality types had high-functioning role models (parents?) in their lives, but were offered little coaching by these very busy, otherwise preoccupied parents. So, the expectation to perform is high and the skills are low. That leads to deep depression and feelings of inadequacy, that are so excruciating they have led to trauma and ultimately dissociation. The dissociation produces exhilarating self-assuring messages of superiority, expansiveness, or grandiosity, born of a genetic theory that people are inherently who they are. So, now they see that they are inherently divine. All of us are born Divine, in my opinion. Childhood experiences disavow us or confirm these beliefs, which can lead to a lack of humility.

So, this injured soul believes she has inborn superior powers, which she now acts out. Since they are born of vivid fantasy, they are not grounded. These fantasies are a set-up for failure. Hence, the grown child falls into a depression until the boost resurfaces.

Healing from bipolar will require the extended coaching mama and daddy never offered that leads to earning our way constructively and the experiences that enhance problem-solving.

Depression, from loss or injury, that has lasted a lifetime could possibly lead to dementia if it never gets processed. Depression that has lasted a shorter time and is based in loss can be transcended with problem-solving and modification of expectations. When we get older, multitasking is not so good. Memory for names of people and things and dates can begin to escape us. These are traits of depression too. I don't know if they interact or could be mistaken one for the other. I say, lighten your load and practice focusing as much as you can when act.

Absolutely, he needs help. He is on a short fuse because of a painful issue or issues he never fully addressed (faced, acknowledged, and expressed). Until he does, he will scapegoat others, even if those others are only plates.

It depends upon her treatment. She needs to find out and spend some time discussing how she was treated as an infant. I believe mothers with postpartum have had something traumatic happen in their own infancy. It may be something that can never be uncalled, but the feeling can be visited, just as well. When we visit a feeling and process it, it goes away. For example, you can focus on your fear of picking up a baby until you imagine the end result of that fear and can scream, wail or cry it out.

Postpartum results from an experience that had an accompanying message. It needs to be unraveled. Sometimes new experiences can invalidate the old message. There are ways to relax and revisit infancy, and I don't mean hypnosis.

Healing depends upon one's willingness to humbly face our fears courageously, while loving the truth and observing the outcome and ourselves.

Are you a father or mother? Either way why is he concerned? Who taught him there was anything wrong with his penis size? Discuss it. Many women prefer smaller penises, because they are not as painful. (Are you talking about how a penis is used in intercourse?) If you are a mother that's something to share. If you are a father, you can still share it and add that you believe your penis was that size when you were his age and that time may add size. Ultimately, the world cares what kind of man he becomes.

You are self-conscious, because you fear you are not enough. That's a lie, but it's what you believe. From where did that lie come? You might want to talk back to an empty chair.

After identifying the lie, you need to become curious about others. What do you do to set them at ease. If you can't see others, your introversion has become selfish.

Sometimes, we have a fear of criticism because we were criticized too much or at unforgettable moments. Who did that to you? Are they still around? If so, tell them how it affected you, or tell them to stop, if they still do it. If they can't, avoid them.

All this is to say find the source and rewrite your script, to include curiosity about the world. You don't want to die not having lived, because you worried about what other people thought. Frankly, for the most part, they don't care. They are too busy worrying about what others think of them.

Absolutely yes, however, it depends upon to whom you are speaking if you want to know which is best. In my opinion the best treatment comes from the best theory and practice.

I believe all behavior is caused by events of childhood, or sometimes adulthood. AA says, "If it's hysterical it's historical." I agree with that. A solid childhood would tend to make us resilient, and a sketchy childhood would tend to make us feel vulnerable or empty. If we have symptoms of inadequacy, we need to find out from where they came. I believe the more we understand the origins of our suffering, the easier it is to fix.

There are three main, common origins of suffering: insecure attachment before the age of five, and especially the younger we were; families that blame together rather than self-reflect together; and repression ethics, that keep us from expressing our authentic selves, thoughts, feelings and all. If there is a therapist who overlooks these three causes, I suggest they will not be as effective or will have more fallout or side-effects.

First she needs to review the truths of the accident and what lessons it offered, short of drama and exaggerations. When she is ready, you can sit with her as she drives around in a parking lot, then the block, then a familiar route. Each time, you can stop for an ice-cream done afterwards of a frozen yogurt. I had such an accident and I eventually drove up the coast of California to the Hearst Castle and stayed in a hotel that overlooked the ocean and had a jacuzzi. After achieving that goal and returning home I was fine to drive again.